New Year's Resolutions?

I have stopped making resolutions.  I know myself too well: why set myself up for for failure?  I start out with the best intentions, but somewhere along the way they always seem to get derailed.  So, with that said, I have decided that I will instead share with you a list of resolutions that I think other people would make for me.  Of course there's no guarantee that I'll do any of them; but it will give us all a litle food for thought:

• Schmoop-Dog - he wants me to resolve to finally marry him.  I broke off our engagement in 2003; yet he still introduces me as his fiancee.  This is complicated; but it won't happen this year.  Sorry Schmoopie.
• My mother - wants me to resolve that I will let her do my hair.  The one time in past memory that I let her do my hair for a big party I was to attend: she did my hair like hers.  My mother is 80.  You paint the picture!  Sorry Marie: that isn't happening either.
• My sister - wants me to dress my age.  I believe in dressing for the occasion and in what looks good on me and is comfortable.  So what if I have skater sneaks with skulls on them?  They are comfortable.  So what if I like South Pole thermals from the men's section of JC Penney?  They are comfy, trendy and they don't have them in Women's sizes.  And if I have a pair of pink Tims: that's my business and I'll wear them with all the Joe Boxer socks I want.  .  Not all of us can dress from the Garanimals section of her favorite boutique!  Sorry sister.  
• Kitty - wants me to leave my job (which pays all the bills) and get a job as a cashier at TJ Maxx so we can work together.  I'd have to work 105 hours a week to make the same money.  Love you honey and appreciate you wanting to work with mom: but we'd end up living in the car!
• Brie - wants me to resolve to use "accoutrements" since I have been celibate for 5 years, by choice.  Why does she want me to cry?  One IS the loneliest number!  So not happening (and I'm blushing)!
• Taryn - wants me to resolve to win the lottery so we can go to L.A. where she will stalk celebrities.  I've been to L.A., and as soon as I got there all the celebrities flew to the east coast.  For real!  Taryn wants to be the 7th "friend" and live Jennifer Anniston's life.  Sorry T, but your fiance would probably object to you camping out on Leonardo DiCaprio's doorstep; and I don't want to spend my lottery winnings on your bail.
• Pumpkin - wants me to resolve to quit my job and stay home so I can feed her treats and rub her belly while she licks her gums in ecstasy.  Don't ask.  Not happening.
• Luna - wants me to resolve to get rid of Pumpkin.  Again, not happening.  Luna hates everybody but she's just going to have to love her baby sister because she's not going anywhere 😁
• The Hockey Guy - wants me to stop being a distraction so he can concentrate on his job.  Don't blame me if I can make you blush!  It's fun and he's cute.

I guess those are the main resolutions others would make for me.  I'm sure there are more, but this entry can only be so long.  Oh I'm sure when tomorrow rolls around, I'll think about a resolution that has to do with my writing.  But last year I said I'd be published in 2010, and I made that happen.  http://www.bn.com/ look for "Southern Hospitality" and "Three's the Charm".  The first name is Rita :o)

BE safe tonight in whatever you do.  I'd hate to lose any of you; or have you out of commission for any reason.  Be responsible, and I'll talk to you next year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!