Why Pumpkin Was in the Doghouse

Everyone knows that Pumpkin Louise is my beautiful little diva dog. With her luxurious hair, lively face, calm demeanor and intelligence: you can automatically tell she is a show dog (although we don't show her). Lilly, on the other hand, from the back looks like Albert Einstein and the weasel from Foghorn Leghorn cartoons had a baby. Her long-haired Chihuahua-ness never quite manifested itself properly. But we love her unconditionally and she has a pretty face and street smarts.

I thought that Pumpkin's good breeding and lady-like ways would rub off on Lilly. WRONG! It seems like the opposite has happened. Hence the reason why Pumpkin is in the doghouse.

A few months ago Lilly got into my work bag and ate an entire Milky Way Midnight bar. 3 ounces of dark chocolate will kill a 10 pound dog. Lilly weighs 7 pounds and the candy bar was 2.7 ounces. It wasn't all dark chocolate but it was enough that I snatched her up and took her to the emergency vet so I could lighten up my wallet. Thankfully they were able to induce vomiting so all of the dark chocolate came up. Crisis averted, and Lilly was mad at me for the rest of the night!

I thought she had learned her lesson until about a week later.  The girls and I had gone out to dinner. When we came back, there was a Dove Dark Chocolate bar laying by their bed with a perfectly shaped bite taken out of it. "Lilly! Are you trying to kill yourself?" Yet the girls blamed me because apparently it had come from my work bag. "You need to put your stuff away! Your dark chocolate is going to kill Lilly!" they cried. "You have to take her to the emergency vet!" Are you kidding me? I didn't notice them pitching in any part of the $300 I knew it would cost me, just like last time. I picked Lilly up and headed out the door.

In the car she looked at me with her huge dark eyes and I couldn't stay mad. She was just a dog, and she loved me to distraction. I didn't want anything to happen to her. I pulled into the parking lot and went in with her in my arms.  "Didn't we just see you not too long ago?" the receptionist asked, rubbing her hands in glee at the thought of more of my hard-earned money going into their coffers.

"Sadly yes, and we're here because she ate more dark chocolate." "Oh no: how much?" "There was a bite taken out of a Dove Dark Chocolate bar. " She looked askance at me. "Why do you leave your chocolate where she can get to it?" "I don't!" I said defensively. "She just goes where she isn't supposed to." The vet tech came out and tsked when she saw Lilly. I explained what happened. "How much do  you think she consumed?" "Only one bite," I answered. "Oh that's not as bad as last time. How about I let you take her home and you watch her very carefully. If she shows any suspicious signs, bring her back immediately." Thankfully, they didn't charge me.

When I got her home the girls took her from me and fussed all over her, which she loved. Pumpkin and I were relegated to the other couch, which was fine with me. Of course my diva girl wanted her belly rubbed, so she turned over on her back and I rubbed her belly. As I looked lovingly at her, I noticed something. Her mouth seemed to be in the exact same shape as the bite from the candy bar! "Pumpkin Louise! Did you frame Lilly???" The girls looked at me like I was nuts (nothing new). "Did you throw away the candy bar?" "No," Brie said, "it's on the table." She went and got it; I held it by Pumpkin's mouth and sure enough: the bite was the exact same size and shape! She had taken a bite out of it and left the bar there as evidence. Yet we knew Pumpkin hadn't eaten the dark chocolate, because it would have shown up in the white fur around her mouth and neck. I knew she was smart, but who knew she was that smart. Little bratty girl! She was definitely too smart for her own good!

So from that point on, I kept the dark chocolate out of their reach. And that's why Pumpkin was in the doghouse: because she framed her poor sister!

Random Thoughts Again!

 As I'm sitting at my desk at work, I happen to be eating some poor man's Oreos. These are the little six-pack of cookies you can buy at the store that aren't as good as a real pack, but hit the spot anyway and keep you from eating a real pack of 39 cookies. So as I'm eating these cookies, I look at my desk and see the Clementine I found in my work bag. I had already eaten my sandwich; so this just reminded me of the lunches Marie used to pack for us in elementary school. The only thing missing was the boiled egg. Ah, memories!

Looks like I'm going to have to update my husband list. Jason Mamoa is getting a divorce! I'm sad that a marriage is breaking up, but still - it's Jason Mamoa!

I've worked in a new department since October 18th and I love it; and my new team! My co-worker Jesse's office is just across the way from mine, and I have a clear view of him in his office. Earlier he was eating something and not sharing. He must think he's invisible. He is not. Hook a sista up Jesse!

I had to leave work to take Kitty to work since Debbi is in Florida on vacation. I had asked her what time she wanted me to pick her up. She said, "11:30". I asked, "Do you have to stop anywhere on your way?" She said no. Yet she didn't have to clock in until 1:00. She is just like my father and my sister: they also had to be at work mega-early because...I don't know, they thought they might miss something?? I'm sure in my father's case it was to be social: have a cup of coffee, visit with his co-workers, that kind of thing. Kitty likes to get the lay of the land: see who's working, maybe have some lunch, or take a walk to Hobby Lobby or Home Depot. But my sister was the worst: she would set her alarm clock 2 hours early. I finally had to ask her, "Why do you set your alarm so early, when you don't get up?" She answered, and I'm not making this up, "So I know I have 2 more hours to sleep." 😮 OR: you could just stay asleep until it was time to get up! That never made any sense to me, but I guess it worked for her. And even with that: she would still get to work with at the very least an hour to spare so she could read the paper, which she also could have done at home. But like they say: different strokes for different folks! I know the early bird is supposed to get the worm but who wants that???

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of this week I did the same thing: got home from work, put on my jammies, said I was taking a nap until dinner and then slept through dinner and most of the evening. When I'd wake up I'd think it was morning, but it was only 9:30, or 11:00, or 11:54 p.m. What the heck? But I have a situation going on that is just draining me, so it's kind of understandable. Then I go back to sleep: only to wake up at 2 a.m., or 3 a.m. and stay awake. Then I pass the time running plot lines through my head. When I finally go back to sleep, surprise! My alarm goes off within 15 minutes. This is not an example of good sleep habits. Especially when I woke up this morning and Lilly was happily snoozing on my head. Seriously!

Look: Jesse is eating again! I can't tell what he has but it looks good. I'm going to have to talk to him about that. After all: sharing is caring! I'm kidding: he doesn't have to share his food. I just like to pick on him. Mangia Jesse!

And now: back to my spreadsheet. Until another random thought hits! Like this one: I'm listening to Pure Moods 1 on YouTube.  The 16th song is called "The Heart Asks Pleasure First" by Michael Nyman. It is a song with beautiful piano playing in it. Every time I hear it (and yes I downloaded it and it's also my ringtone) I think of my sister Robin. This was a song she could have easily played, because she was a classically trained pianist. So whenever I hear it, I think of her and it calms my soul. Miss you Sissy...

Same As It Ever Was

 So...this Christmas was going to be different, I said. I'm going to wrap presents early, I said. Why do I lie to myself, and others???

I was so pleased with myself because I received all of my online orders early or on time. I was going to immediately open them, sort them, and wrap them as they came. I was going to be ahead of the game and just relax Christmas Eve, drinking dark chocolate hot cocoa and watching Christmas specials. That was my plan right up until Christmas Eve, when I realized I hadn't opened any of the packages and now could only vaguely remember what I had ordered for which daughter and where I had hidden them!

You would have thought this would have spurred me to action but NOPE. As Brie kept saying, "You'd better do your wrapping NOW before you get sleepy and then want to take a nap and then wake up in the middle of the night and then sit up mad until daybreak." I indignantly kept replying, "I'm going to start wrapping as soon as you leave for Adam's house to get your stuff out of the way, and then I'll wrap Kitty's when she goes upstairs. Trust me: I've got this."

And as you can imagine: I didn't have it. When Brie left, I bribed Kitty to wrap her sister's gifts for me. She was happy to oblige, and add her name to a couple. I didn't care because it allowed me to continue to "rest" on the couch. She did a great job too: thanks to my flat wrap. You know I'm not going to fool around with the rolled paper! I have no patience for that and I'm happy to order flat wrap from Amazon every year. Which the girls happily use as well! But I digress...

When Kitty was done and had them placed artfully around the tree, she asked when was I going to finish wrapping. I said, "As soon as you go to bed. And no peeking!" You know Kitty didn't believe this for a minute. "Well make sure you do it and put the gifts under the tree." "Of course I will!"

And of course I didn't! When Kitty went upstairs to bed, I immediately laid down on the couch. Brie texted me to make sure I was doing what I was supposed to be doing, and I lied and said I was busy wrapping. Busy napping is more like it! And just like every year in recent history: I fell asleep. I woke up at 4:20 in the morning, horrified. Then I decided to watch a couple of TV shows. Hey: "Mom" was on! By the time I had gathered the presents I could find, it was going on 6 a.m.! I hauled the items into the dining room, opened them and commenced to wrapping. It probably would have been more successful if I'd commenced rapping, because I hadn't found everything! I wrapped what I had and then had to go scavenging for the rest of the presents. I found a few, but not all. Oh well: the girls were used to that. But it was still a good haul for them, considering they are grownups! By the time I had everything under the tree it was 8:18 in the morning. I laid on the couch and put the blanket over my face. 

Kitty was up at 8:40. Wow, the shortest nap for me in history! But she said she would wait for Brie to get home so we could open our gifts together. However, she did do her stocking and was pleased. When Brie got home around 10 a.m. or so, she laid on the other couch and tried to stay awake while Kitty opened her presents. She was thrilled with everything: especially the Sailor Moon hoodie her sister had gotten for her. Afterwards, Brie and I fell asleep while Kitty watched Christmas shows. Finally we woke up enough to open ours. Kitty won the "Make Someone Cry" award for the beautiful magnet she got her sister, talking about the special relationship sisters have and how much she loves her. Go Kitty! Made me miss my sister a little more, but it was worth it to see Brie cry 😊

So let's be real: no one was surprised that I was up so late (or early, depending on your perspective!) trying to find and wrap presents. And no one was surprised that 2 days later I was still finding and giving them gifts! I guess that's just part of my charm.

Anyhoo, I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas and will have a wonderful 2022. I want to thank whoever was in a reading mood New Year's Eve, because I had 80 reads which put me over 27,000 for the life of this blog. Thank you so much! And as usual: no resolutions for me except to keep writing and hopefully keep entertaining you all. You are always welcome to reach out to me!

Stay safe, stay healthy and Happy New Year! Blessings to you all 💗 And trust me: next year I'm really wrapping the gifts early!