Topless TV

This is one of Brie's favorite stories from a LONG time ago!

I was at work staring out the window, which took some doing since I didn’t sit anywhere near a window.  I was wishing that I could go home early because I had finished the project I was working on and didn’t want to start another one that day.  Then my phone rang.

“Ohhh, I’m so sick,” moaned a voice on the phone.

“Who is this?” I asked, suspiciously.

“Mommy, it’s me and I don’t feel good.  Hold on.”  I was sorry I had when I heard the sounds of Brie puking.  “Come home, I need you.”

“Need me for what?  You’re eighteen; what can I do?”

“I just need you.  Come home!”  Puke.

“Yuck!  Okay, I’ll be there in half an hour.”

I had wanted to go home early, but not to hold her hand while she threw up!  I should have been more specific when I made my wish!  However, being the good mother that I was, I went home to tend to her.

Wouldn’t you know it?  She was asleep on the couch and didn’t need me!  At least she wasn’t puking or crying, thank goodness.  I’d start dinner early.  It was a warm late spring afternoon, and as I took off my work clothes I decided, since Brie was asleep and I could hear Kitty watching TV in their room, that I wouldn’t need to get dressed right away.  I also decided to make a family favorite for dinner: Shanghai Beef.  I needed to cut some beef into cubes, and Ricki Lake was on, so I thought I would just do it in the living room.  I pulled a kitchen chair into the doorway of the living room, next to the couch where Brie was sleeping, got a plate with the beef, a steak knife and fork, turned on the TV and commenced to cutting.

Of course, Binky (our other cat at the time) and Luna were milling about: curious as to what “mom” was doing.  Either that or wondering what I was doing without my shirt and pants on!  But I didn’t pay too much attention to them because I was too engrossed in what was happening with Ricki’s guests.

Luna, nimble kitten that she was, jumped up on the side of my chair to investigate.  Apparently I wasn’t doing anything too interesting because she jumped right back down.  Then, as a guest screamed at her boyfriend for cheating on her, I felt this piercing pain in my side.  Yelping, I looked and saw clumsy Binky hanging by a claw dug into my side!  I moved the plate to my left hand so I could unhook the kitten.  The plate landed right underneath poor Brie’s nose; she inhaled, sat up, and puked!  Then she started crying because she had finally gotten comfortable enough to sleep, and the smell of the “bloody raw meat” woke her up and started her throwing up again.  She didn’t even care that Binky was dangling like a little klingon from my side!

Is there ever any sympathy for mom?  Nope!  So the motto was not to cut up meat in your underwear; OR not to have bloody meat where Brie can smell it!  😏