So You Think You Can...What??

Last week on TV I had the finales of DWTS and American Idol, which I didn’t really watch but did want to know who won.  I was very happy knowing that it was the last nights for these shows so some time would open up for me to do other things.  Then during AI a commercial came on announcing that the NEXT night, So You Think You Can Dance would be coming on.  Seriously??

I absolutely love that show.  They have dancing up there that has to be seen to be believed, it’s so incredible!  What a great way to showcase talent that otherwise might have gone undiscovered.  Kudos to Nigel Lythgoe!

Anyhoo, as I’ve mentioned before, a lot of times we make our own fun at my house.  Usually this involves Brie and I, since Kitty thinks we’re unbearably silly at times (she and her Living Dead dolls had an election in her room to see who’d be president, but I’m the silly one).  Kitty was at work so it was just Brie and I home to watch the show.

We admired and were moved by the lithe contemporary dancers, enjoyed the hip-hop/b-boy/turf dancers, and laughed at the delusional ones who actually thought they could dance well enough to be on the show.  Such entertainment!

Then we saw this one contemporary couple who did this really intricate move: it looked like she was on her stomach while he was on his hands and knees over her; then she reached behind and over him to grab her ankles and they did this rolling move.  So of course I looked at Brie and said, “I bet we can do that.”

“Mother, no!  You know what always happens when we try to imitate dances people do on TV.”

She was right of course, because the two of us have caused ourselves more injuries based on trying to copy dance moves, than law allows.  Trust me: we are no MC Hammers, Vanilla Ice’s or even in my case Sophie B Hawkins or Michael Flatley!  Pumpkin River Dances better than I do!  (That’s right: picture me trying to RiverDance!)  But nothing deters the Lordess of the Dance!

“Come on Brie, it looks so easy!  You’re smaller and more limber so you lay on the floor on your stomach and I’ll just be over you on my hands and knees and you grab your ankles.  It’ll be fun!”

She didn’t look as if she believed me, but she agreed and reluctantly got down on the floor.  I am not a floor person, so it took a minute for me to actually get down on my hands and knees over her.  And this is where the issues began…

First of all, we are curvaceous women, as opposed to the willowy contemporary dancers.  So laying on her stomach Brie was up higher than the girl on TV; and this went for her…backside too since she’s built like Jessica Rabbit.  Then you have to throw my curves into the mix, as I’m positioning myself over her but now my additional “frontal” curves are adding to her…horizontal height.  Now she was supposed to reach around and grab her ankles so we can do the rolling part. I’m not saying we would have been able to look very graceful, but Pumpkin decided that she wanted to be a part of the dance and began scooting across the carpet towards Brie, and then she jumped up and started licking her face.  This caused Brie to start laughing, and I could feel the vibrations of her laughter since I was practically resting on top of her.  This in turn made me laugh, but I still told her to grab her ankles!  However, she said she couldn’t because I wasn’t as thin as that male dancer and her arms weren’t long enough to reach.  I just laughed harder and told her I’d squish myself down more and told her to “Reach!”  But now that she was squished, she couldn’t move to grab her ankles.  So now she’s laughing, Pumpkin’s still licking her face and I just collapse on her and laugh and laugh.  “Get off me!” she finally gasps.  Now it’s going to take me a minute to get up between the laughing and being on the floor and stuff.  But finally I got up and so did she.

“Seriously Mother?” she said.

I shrugged.   “It sure looked easier on TV.  I really thought we could do it.”

“When are we going to learn our lesson?  We can’t do what they do on TV, or else we’d be on TV!”

“Okay, okay.  I’ve learned my lesson.  I won’t make you try anything else I see on TV.”

That is…not until So You Think You Can Dance comes on again this week!!!  J