I Need a New Sweater

 Even though Marie and I had our ups and downs, this is one of my favorite memories of an up time.

One Saturday several years ago, she called me. "What are you doing?" "Nothing," I answered. "Oh good. Can you take me to JC Penney to buy a sweater?" "Okay."

So I picked her up and proceeded to head for the mall. "We don't have to go to the mall." "We don't? But you wanted to buy a sweater." "No I don't. I just needed to get out of that house for a while!"

I had to laugh at that. Every so often she did need a break from the family members that lived with her. I certainly understood it! "Okay then, where do you want to go?" "How about the Peppermill?" I turned the car around and took her to her favorite hometown restaurant, which was actually about four blocks from her house!

This began a tradition: she would call me to 'go buy a sweater', and we would sneak out for a late lunch. Each time we returned to her house sweater-less, Robin would look at us in confusion. "Where is the new sweater?" Marie would say, "Oh, they didn't have anything I liked," or "I wanted a cardigan and they didn't have any," or "They had awful colors!" Then Robin would say, "Maybe you need to go someplace other than JC Penney!"

That bought us more time! So now we would say we were going to Peter Harris, or Sears, or Walmart, or TJ Maxx to find the ever elusive cardigan. And no one was ever any the wiser!

I enjoyed those lunches with Marie. It's sad to know that I won't have a chance to have any more with her...

Oh, and for Christmas that year surprise, surprise: Robin got her a cardigan sweater! 😄

I Knew it Would Be One Day...

 You know it's going to be one day, but you never expect it to be that particular day. I was at work on September 22 when my cell rang. The caller ID said Elderwood, which is where Marie was. I answered and was told that I might want to come see her as soon as possible, since they didn't believe she would make it through the weekend. I called Brie, who said she would drive me. I texted Clancy, who said he and Keith would visit her the next day. But I told him they might want to go up that day because there were no guarantees.

Brie and I got there and I went to Marie's room. Wow, she looked so tiny in her bed. Of course she was only 4'11" but had lost weight. I told her I was there and she opened her eyes a couple of times to see me. I had made a gospel playlist on my phone and played some of her favorite songs as I talked to her. I apologized for some things, told her I loved her, told her some funny stories while I rubbed her hand and stuff. I didn't want any regrets and wanted her to be at peace too. Finally Keith and Clancy got there and I moved to the background so they could talk to her. Of course she opened her eyes for them for a few minutes because they were her boys, ha ha. I knew this was hard on them but they held up pretty well. Then it was time to go.

The final call came first thing Sunday morning and I knew even before I saw the caller ID. She passed September 24, 2023 and I told them I would be up as soon as I got a hold of Clancy. I was glad that it was just he and I, since it was hard seeing Marie with no life left in her. I again told her I loved her, as did Clancy, and we collected her personal effects: donating the clothes. When I opened her nightstand, I found a container full of cards; and also a memory scrapbook full of pictures and captions of her family! My cousin Kathy had made it and sent it to her. It was amazing, and I'm so glad I found it. I was so happy to see so many indications of the love people had for her.

I don't think I'll ever forget how she looked. Not in a bad way, because to me it looked like she had inhaled her last breath and then passed. However, I know she exhaled that breath in Heaven. Hallelujah!

Her wake was 10.1.2023, and her funeral was 10.2.2023 and she is buried with my father in the Saratoga National Cemetery. I am so grateful for everyone that came (especially my cousin Ann who came up from North Carolina),  everyone that sent flowers and cards, emails and texts. The kind gestures were very much appreciated.

There is a lovely framed photo of my parents that Kitty hung in our living room.  I like having it there.

Marie, I'm glad that you are happy and healthy and with your loved ones that passed before you. Cuddle Pumpkin for me, and try to be nice to Victoria! 😘 You will be missed.

"I will arise, I will go to Jesus, He will embrace me in his arms, In the arms of my dear Savior, There will be 10,000 charms."

Just a couple of her beautiful arrangements. Much love to you all.

The Commercial Continues!

As usual, I had recorded my soap and was watching it one day last week. I had been fast forwarding through the commercials, but I was playing a game on my phone too (Queen of the multi-taskers!). All of a sudden, I heard a commercial start and I glanced at the screen to see my nemesis: the Jardiance commercial gal. However, there was something different about it. So I rewound it...

And found that it was Part II! For some reason, home girl was on a bus heading out of town, instead of coming out of her apartment building. Where was she going? I wondered. The bus stops, she fist bumps some random guy sitting up front, then she hops off in another part of town. She heads for the new town square to sing about the magnificence of Jardiance, the little pill with a big story to tell, while doing her usual dancing wearing the same blue outfit.  

But then: the plot thickens. The man at the fruit stand is grooving, then he spots home girl and of course she has to go dancing over to him. But unlike with the mailman of the previous commercial, this time it seems more...intimate. Eye contact, smiles and when her "handler" comes over to get her, the fruit man makes sure to touch her shoulder. I immediately think 'she's cheating on the mailman with the fruit grocer'!! The utter audacity! No wonder she had to take a bus out of town.

From there, the commercial goes back to her going to the stylist who again gives her this yellow dress with big red flowers plastered all over it, she has her hair and makeup done by the same dry brush and blow dryer on her already dry hair; and then it's back to the fountain to awkward dance to the end of the commercial.

Needless to say, I was nonplussed. What a 'ho! The poor mailman is probably waiting to deliver her mail, and she's dancing around in another town with another guy. Obviously, she wants a man with his own business, not a government employee. 

I was so annoyed I saved the soap so I could show Brie the commercial, and she could share my outrage. Instead, she said, "What is the matter with you?" or something to that effect. "It's a commercial!" "But why did she have to leave town?" "To spread the word about Jardiance!" "Well she didn't need to be all up on that other man. 'Ho!" Needless to say, Brie was done with me at this point. However, I stand by the postman.

I can't wait to see who she's with when Part III rolls around, as she spreads her 'ho-dom and news about Jardiance to the next town! Oh you know there's more to come so stay tuned! 😀

Easy Peasy!

 Several months ago I found out that I had a large cataract in my left eye. I was sent to an ophthalmologist because I needed surgery.

I liked the doctor, but it would be another six months before my surgery was scheduled. So that gave me half a year to worry. In the office, I had seen a video of the laser procedure, and it didn't seem terrible. That made me feel better...right up until the nurse told me that for the laser procedure, I had to pay $1450 out of pocket. I said, "Since that isn't going to happen, what do you do: use a spoon to scoop out the cataract?" Oh how they laughed! But I was serious! Then the doctor proceeded to tell me how they used to do it years ago, and I started wondering: is sight really that important? 😎 The right eye seemed okay still. But then I put my big girl panties on and decided I had to have the surgery. Then he said I had to be awake for it. WTH? How was that going to be accomplished, because if I saw a needle or anything coming towards my eye, it was going to be a wrap.

Then he explained that I wouldn't feel a thing, or even see anything going towards my eye. This would be accomplished by them dousing my eye with numbing solution, antibacterial solution and God only knows what else. He said after that, the only thing I would see would be like looking through a kaleidoscope: nothing but colors. I had no other choice but to trust him. Ugh.

I started doing my $45 eye drops a week before the surgery. I figured they must be made of molten gold but I did what I was told. The day of the surgery arrived and Brie drove me to Latham where the procedure was to take place. They told me to take a seat and I would be called in shortly, as they called your name and then the doctor's name. One doctor had six patients called in before me. I was wondering how he could have done all of these patients so fast, and then I was called. When I was led into the back: I saw all of these patients lined up in recliners, so that was how they were all called in a row. Anyhoo, they had me sit in one of the recliners, and this is so they can lean you back and douse your eyes with 3 sets of 5 eyedrops so your eye is swimming. But as long as it did the trick of keeping me from seeing or feeling anything, I was okay with that. 

The worst thing about this was that it took the anesthesiologist 4 times to get the needle in a vein in my hand for the "relaxer". I told him he  had one more chance and then they had better call in a "vampire" to do it. He finally got it in. Side note: they tell you not to eat or drink anything before the surgery, then by the time you get there you're dehydrated so naturally it's tough to get a good vein! But I digress...

The funny thing that happened was while they were dousing my eye this man came into my section. He saw me and winked and smiled at me as he washed his hands. I was thinking, hmm, who's this cutie? Is he flirting with me, while I'm wearing a mesh cap on my head and mesh booties? NOPE! It was actually the doctor! For some reason he looked totally different than he did in the office. I actually told him that when he came over to see how I was doing, and he laughed. "Everybody tells me that!" he said. It's true. So ix-nay on the irting-flay, ha ha .

Finally they wheeled me into the surgery suite. The doctor said they were going to begin, and I asked the nurse what time it was. She said 12:15. Then, true to what they had told me, I only saw colors and a brief glimpse of the doctor. I felt nothing!! When it was over I asked the nurse again what time it was and she said 12:30. It only took 15 minutes and I didn't feel a thing, for which I was so thankful!

After a brief time of being in the recovery room, drinking water to be sure the "relaxer" hadn't upset my system, I was free to go. Brie was in the lobby and after being wheeled to the door she came and got me. I had a clear plastic "eye patch" taped over my eye, directions for home care and that was it. Easy peasy! It was so easy that I'm going to get the other one done in December, so they will be the same. That cataract isn't as bad and the doctor said I could wait a year or so to get it done, but I don't want one eye to be that much ahead of the other. Plus, since it's only 2 days of downtime because you can't drive for 24 hours, I won't have to use any of my personal PTO if I do it over the Christmas break.

Eyedrops for almost a month; and at the most recent follow-up my eye is now 20/20! So that makes the drowning of the eye worth it. I went from hating eyedrops to being an expert at getting them in. That's a win for sure. My advice is if you need cataract surgery: get it done! It's so worth it. And contrary to popular belief: your eye looks no different but the world certainly does! 

The Trumpet Sound...?

 I love it when a short post writes itself!

I'm at work and it will be lunch time soon. I was invited to lunch by a co-worker and went into the restroom to you know: check out my hair and outfit and stuff. Anyhoo, I'm looking in the mirror and thinking about what might be on the lunch menu at the Silo, believing all is right with the world.

Suddenly, I hear this very weird sound: almost like an elephant deep-trumpeting. What the heck? Then I hear it again, only a little louder.  Is anyone else hearing this, I wonder? Then it sounds a third time and what goes through my mind but: is this the trumpet call of Jesus? If it is then I was in trouble because I was still standing there!

I have been a saved Christian for most of my life. Never had a doubt in my mind that when the Rapture happened I'd be caught up in the twinkling of an eye to see Jesus. But to still be standing in the work restroom made me think real quick. Was there something I hadn't been doing correctly? Had I repented of all my sins? Had I said my prayers last night? I missed church yesterday but that was because I was sick, yet still did church from home...

Yes: these errant thoughts immediately went through my mind. And then I had to chuckle to myself. That couldn't have been the trumpet call, because I'm sure Jesus's trumpet sounds better than an elephant. Besides, prophecy up to the Rapture hasn't been fulfilled as of yet. Whew!

Thankfully I ran into my co-worker Cindy in the hallway, who assured me that the sounds were the workmen finishing up their work in the upstairs café. But as I went to my desk, I still looked around to be sure there weren't any empty clothes lying on the floor!  😉

** If you aren't familiar with the Rapture, read the book of Revelation or reach out to me: I'd be glad to discuss it with you! 

Exactly What You Thought Would Happen

 Not only do kids say the darnedest things: they do the darnedest things too. And yes I'm talking about my kids, specifically Brie this time! I may not have the order of events exactly correct, but the events themselves are correct. I cannot make this stuff up!

We will begin with little Brie deciding that she wanted to go sledding. The only problem was: it wasn't winter and there was no snow. So what seemed logical to her? Fashioning a makeshift sled out of a large Luvs diaper box to slide down the inside staircase. What happened? Exactly what you thought would happen: she lost control, careened down the steps and bounced out of the box onto her bottom. She of course cried, my father couldn't hold in his laughter and Marie picked her up to comfort her and scold her grandfather. 

Brie seemed to have a penchant for the stairs. One day she decided she wanted to be a tightrope walker. How was she going to accomplish this? By carefully putting her feet into the empty spaces of the bannister and carefully walking, moving her feet from space to space. Of course, after a little bit she got cocky and figured she would do a spin. What happened? Exactly what you thought would happen. Her foot slipped and she took a bit of a tumble down the stairs. She cried, my father couldn't hold in his laughter and Marie picked her up to comfort her and scold her grandfather.

I had bought Brie a cute pair of patent leather Mary janes to wear to church. You know: the shiny black ones with a tiny heel that made the appropriate tap-tap-tapping sound when she walked. She loved these shoes!

Marie told her that they were just for church and to not wear them outside because they were slippery. So what did Brie do? Not only did she wear them outside: she decided to jump rope while wearing them. What happened? Exactly what you thought would happen. She jumped, came down, her heel slipped and she landed on her butt. She cried, Marie picked her up to scold and comfort her, yet my father missed out because he was inside.

But the absolute piece de resistance was this:

Robin came over to babysit while I was working an evening shift. I told her no cupcakes for the kids. The girls had on their feetie jammies and Robin was in the living room, probably watching MTV (her favorite thing). She didn't even notice Brie go sneaking into the kitchen; and Brie didn't notice Kitty sneaking in behind her. The cupcakes (the old-fashioned, delicious Freihofer cupcakes with the soft yummy frosting!) were on top of the kitchen cabinets. Enterprising Brie softly moved a chair over by the sink so she could use it to get on the sink edge and reach the cupcake box. She got on the sink's edge, and reached up to grab the forbidden cupcake box. Apparently Kitty saw this, got excited and let out a squeal. Brie, not knowing that her sister was in the room, let out her own squeal as she partially turned, lost her footing and fell, with her butt landing in a big pot of water that I had in the sink soaking. Robin came running to see what the commotion was, and found Brie sitting in the sink crying. Well, just like her father, Robin started laughing and rescued her poor niece. She wasn't hurt, but was upset because she hadn't gotten the cupcake and Robin wouldn't give her one (even though she ate one herself when they went to bed). She was also upset because her bottom was wet and she had to change into a regular pair of pajamas. But she brought that upon herself!

Of course there were plenty of more incidents, but I only allotted 20 minutes to write this while I'm on a break at work. So thanks for this quick trip down memory lane with me! (and mama loves you Brie!)

Hands to Home

 I have a lot of male friends. Men I've known since elementary school, men I've met through work, and husbands / boyfriends of my good friends. I adore them and they treat me respectfully, and no boundaries are ever crossed. When we meet up we usually hug: especially since during covid no one saw or had any face to face contact with anyone for a year or two.

There are also men that are acquaintances whom I like, but there's no contact. These guys could be my male co-workers, men from church and the like. It's like an unspoken rule that we all know about.

With that being said, let me tell you what happened to me last month, and it still irks the heck out of me.

July 1st, my daughters and I were at our favorite local restaurant having Kitty's birthday dinner. Yes, that isn't her actual birthday but you know we have to start celebrating early! Anyhoo, we were waiting for our food when a guy who is barely an acquaintance comes in with his wife and another woman. He sees me and waves, and I wave back. That was the end of it. I have never met his wife.

His party ended up finishing their meal before we did, and his wife and the other woman went outside or to the car while he went up to the counter to pay. I thought absolutely nothing of this until I suddenly felt someone put their hands on my shoulders from behind and start massaging me. I turned around in horror, and it was this man that had absolutely no business touching me. He starts to make a bit of small talk and Brie was the one who replied, asking him about his kids and grandkids and stuff. I finally got over my shock and moved out of reach. "You all have a good weekend!" he said as he left.

There were many things wrong with this scenario. First of all: I am a domestic violence survivor, so you don't approach me from behind and touch me. Second, never in life has there been any indication from me that you had permission to touch me. Third, how long had this move been brewing around in your head? And fourth: if this had been above-board, why did you wait until your wife left the building? Did you know she wouldn't be pleased with you inappropriately putting your hands on another woman?

Kitty hadn't been paying attention but Brie had. I was mad, but she was mad mad. "WTF?" she said. "I have no idea what that was, my reflexes were slow from shock and it had better not ever happen again," I said. Brie continued, "He owes you a big apology and you had better get one before I start talking to his daughter about his behavior." I knew she would so I said hopefully that was a one-off or else there would be repercussions.

I figured this would never happen again. So imagine my horror when 2 days later he saw me at a venue and did it again! This time I was quick to move and gave him a dirty look. What in the world was wrong with him? 

I thought about this for a couple of days and then decided I needed to talk to someone we both knew, and this way he could talk to the man and get him to cease and desist. Otherwise he was in line to be throat-punched by Brie!

So I spoke to our mutual  person and he was speechless when I told him what happened. He assured me that he would take care of the situation and apologized to me that I had to deal with that inappropriateness. I thanked him and drew a breath of relief.

However, as far as I know, nothing has been said to the encroacher. It's been a month. So I guess my heebie jeebies might have been deemed insignificant, and I just need to wait for the situation to fade away. No harm, no foul.

But there is foul: trust me. I have made sure that I steer clear of the offender. If he approaches me again, I am sure I will say something that will hurt his feelings, and it will be warranted. We were both at a retirement party recently, and he knew by the look on my face when he looked at me, that he needed to avoid me like the plague and he did. Yep: keep your grubby hands to home, like they taught us in elementary school. I no longer consider him an acquaintance. And I have made peace with the fact that the other man didn't say or do anything discernable on my behalf. Maybe it was just too awkward for him, and that's okay. Maybe I just should have confronted the man myself and quashed the situation. But I certainly know who I can and can't trust. Going forward: I will continue to handle things on my own.

So at the end of the day, I just wanted to get this out so I can move forward with no resentment. After all, holding on to anger and resentment isn't going to change anything. As always, I will rise above. And if that means a well-placed throat punch when needed: so be it!