As I've admitted before, I am not petite. Brie has always called me a giant, even though it technically isn't true and she's just a hater. But since she's only 5'5.5", I must seem like Yeti beside her. So it's just a matter of perspective. Marie now is about 4'11", so I don't even want to know how she considers me!
I never thought of myself as scary big. Sure, sometimes children run and hide and villagers light torches, but other than that I usually laugh it if off when someone mentions my height. I get it from my father, who was over six feet tall.
With this in mind, one autumn evening many years ago, I was at home with nothing to do. Kitty was in her room watching a video and I wanted some company. I decided to go visit Marie, who I was sure would be happy to see me.
It was a little brisk out that night, so I pulled on my long black wool coat and headed out. I noticed as I got in my car that the clouds had rolled in, obscuring the moon, but that was okay: at least while in my driveway.
My parents lived in a house that is not only set back from the street, but is surrounded by large trees and shrubbery. It's very picturesque, but the downside is they never bothered to install an outside light and the streetlight only shone so far towards the house. But as I turned into their driveway my headlights didn't show any wildlife lurking about (hi Mr. Skunk!) so I figured a quick walk up to and onto the porch would be non-eventful.
I reached the front screen door and was putting my car keys in my pocket. I reached up to knock on the door, but before I could actually knock the front door opened and there stood Marie. Oh good, she must have seen the headlights when I turned in and had opened the door for me. However, she didn't say anything or move, so neither did I.
Suddenly, she let out a bloodcurdling scream! It scared me so much, I screamed too! Then I said, "What's the matter?" Was someone holding a gun to her back??
"Oh good Lord, it's just you," she said breathlessly, placing a hand over her heart.
"Who in the world did you think it was? You opened the door for me!"
"No, I was getting ready to place the newspaper recycling on the porch. I just opened the door and I saw this great big dark thing looming on the porch. I didn't know what it was!"
Big dark looming thing? I realize I was wearing black and I'm tall, but hellooo! "Who did you think it was: the grim reaper?" By now we were both giggling at how ridiculous we must have looked: standing there screaming in each other's faces! And I did tell her that now might be a good time to finally install a porch light!
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