The Lesser of Two Evils

I’ve always prided myself on being healthy, but my left leg started bothering me.  Nothing major: just some tingling and numbness in the thigh to knee area.  So I made an appointment with my GP to see what the problem was.

“Maxx,” Dr. Bob began seriously, “you have marelgia paresthetica.”

Oh no!  Not marelgia paresthetica!  I’m too young!  What about my children?  Oh, the humanity!  This is what immediately came to mind.  Then I said, “Um, what exactly is marelgia paresthetica?”

“It’s a condition whereby something presses on the nerve located at the top of the thigh, thereby causing numbing of the nerve which traverses down the leg to the knee area.”

I nodded solemnly.  At least it didn’t sound life threatening!  “What is pressing down on that nerve?”

“Your stomach.”

Well how rude was that?  I guess marelgia paresthetica is Greek for “gut overhang”!  I gave Dr. Bob a dirty look.  “Okay, what do you suggest I do to alleviate this condition?”

“Your two choices are diet or exercise.”

Since I try not to do anything with the word “die” in it, I thought the lesser of the two evils would be exercise.  That’s how I ended up at a place called Motivations to take a spin class.

For those of you lucky enough to not know, spinning is a stationary bicycling class where you can change the bike’s tension to simulate outdoor hill riding, jumps, you stand up on the bike, sit down, speed up, slow down – it all depends on the whims of the taskmaster…I mean instructor.  It’s supposed to be a great workout, and I was sure it would take care of my “gut overhang”.  Besides, everyone bicycles.  How hard could it be?

Ah, famous last words!  “Hard” was just the beginning and only described the tiny seat on the spin bike!  By the time we had been working out for about…three minutes, it felt like an additional bone was growing out of my…tender area.  I was sweating, my legs were shaking, and it was just the warm-up!  How was I going to do an entire hour?

By sheer force of will, that’s how!  My sister was also in the class and had been taking it for about 4 months, but I couldn’t let her show me up.  I’m too competitive!  So I gritted my teeth, sucked down my water and pedaled like my evil ex-husband was after me! 

To be honest, I wasn’t able to stay standing for the entire time we were supposed to, but to my credit I never stopped pedaling.  It might have been slow, but the wheels never stopped.

I took the spinning class from July 2003 until February 2004.  And sure enough: my stomach tightened up and the marelgia paresthetica went away.

I continued with spin periodically for the next few years; but unfortunately now I haven't been back for about 2 years.  And although the "gut overhang" hasn't exactly come back, it's friend "muffin top" is trying to rear its ugly head.  So whether I like it or not: it looks like I'll be heading back to Motivations.  After all: Americade is in about 6 weeks and I've got to be in prime form for whatever that weekend might bring!