Becoming a Lady

 You would think that this is something that would come naturally over time. However, when I was a freshman in high school, I got recruited into a girls' club. Here's how that went:

Tammy, one of my best friends, approached me in Science class one day. "Hey, would you like to join this really cool club that I belong to?" "Sure!" I responded. "What is it?" "It's the Shangri-La Theta Rho Girls Club and you'll love it! You can go to the meeting with me tomorrow night." "Sounds good!"

So the following evening my father dropped me off and I met Tammy at the location. There were two female leaders who were thrilled to have a new member. I didn't know what was going on, but afterwards I discovered that they had sodas in the fridge for a $.05 donation. Sold!

Anyhoo, I came to discover that Tammy hated the club and figured if she brought in another member, she could get out. And she did! What she didn't know was I loved the club! It was the young lady version of a Jewish Organization called the Rebekahs, and they were an offshoot of the men's Independent Order of Odd Fellows. It taught us leadership, how to comport ourselves as ladies, how government works, and had conventions and banquets where you got to wear ball gowns! Oh yes: this was right up my alley, although I wasn't Jewish. But they loved me because I was so into everything they did. The Theta Rho motto is "Happiness Through Service". The colors of the Theta Rho Girls’ Club were Yale blue and light peach. Blue is symbolic of the bluebird and represents happiness. Light peach represents thoughtfulness and taught us to render service to others. A happy day for me was when I received my bluebird pin! (yes I'm a nerd)

It turned out that our particular club was known for it's...for want of a better word...routines that we would perform. Picture a marching band without instruments: that was us! Mrs. Beryl Hungerford and Mrs. Gregory were great at coming up with these routines. And they had a clicker that would let us know when to do the next set of steps so they didn't have to say a word. It was awesome and we were known throughout the state!

The club taught young ladies things like serving in the community, respect for yourself and others, how ladies neither chewed gum nor crossed their legs: you crossed your ankles and turned your legs to the side. These things were really easy when you were wearing a ball gown and feeling like Miss America!

My parents wouldn't let me go to sleepovers at my friends' houses, but they let me go out of town to these conventions for the weekend without a qualm. I could also go to the Theta Rho sleepovers at girls' houses. And if my parents knew what went on: they would have had serious second thoughts! One time a girl snuck in a Playgirl; and that was a bit of education I was definitely not ready for! Mrs. H caught us looking at it and she reprimanded the girls for exposing me to such a thing. She took that contraband, but I always wondered if she and Mrs. G looked at it!  I was the youngest member since Tammy defected, but I didn't care. And I stayed with this club until I graduated high school. I was even nominated and elected to a State Office during my tenure! Whoo hoo!

I also recruited my cousins Denise and Ivy into the club. They were as excited as I was about the weekend getaways. The rest of it: not so much but they were troopers and we really liked doing things together. And one year Denise was nominated to be the Queen. Our club had never had that before. And since we were the only chocolate chips in the cookie: the organization had never had a girl of color as the Queen. So we were doubly excited and knew Denise was a shoo-in.

The last night of the convention Denise looked great in her ice-blue gown and white sandals. Mrs. Hungerford and Mrs. Gregory fussed over her and made sure she looked perfect. Then they were aghast when they realized she was chewing gum! "Spit that out!" Mrs. H said, handing her a Kleenex. "Proper young ladies do not chew gum, at least not in public." Denise obeyed.  Then they began calling up the candidates, and Denise walked like a Nubian queen to the dais with the other contestants and sat down. 

We were all so excited! The crown was in the bag! She stood up to answer her questions, and then sat down. We were all clutching hands and planning the celebration. And then the unthinkable happened: the last time she sat down, she crossed her legs! "Noooo!!!!" was our collective wail. Mrs. H. was pantomiming for her to uncross her legs but alas: it was too late. The judges saw the crossed legs and as you can imagine: Denise did not win.  In her defense she always crossed her legs and old habits are hard to break: no matter how much lady training  you have.

I have no idea if those clubs still exist. It seems like such an old-fashioned premise in this day and age. I don't know if Denise and Ivy ever think about it like I do. But back then I thought it was wonderful, fun and served its purpose. R.I.P. Mrs H and Mrs. G: you did a good thing for us girls.