It's My Turn

I was at the hair salon this morning for my usual standing appointment. A woman who works for the company that I do came in and hurried up to me. "Guess what?" she said excitedly.

I knew exactly what had her so excited. "You got your transfer?"

"Yes!" she practically screamed. "I'll be starting in the Arizona office after the first of the year!"

As she prattled on, and on, and ON about what the new job meant, starting over, a new life, blah, blah, blah I realized that she was probably the 10th or 12th person within the past couple of months that was transferring or already transferred to a new job in one of the four main hubs for our company. Yep: they were all starting a new exciting chapter in their lives.

And it's not just at work: I have friends that are engaged, newlyweds, pregnant, and one even JUST graduated nursing school last night! With all of these positive life-changing events going on around me it makes me wonder: when will it be MY turn?

I guess that depends on what I ultimately want.  Do I want to transfer to Hot-Lanta, Tacoma, Dallas or Tucson? No.  Do I want to be pregnant? Nothing for me to carry a baby in. Do I want to be married? Been there, done that and burned that particular t-shirt.  Do I want to be engaged? Another diamond would be nice, but I'm not pining for one. Do I want to go back to school? I have 2 degrees already.

And it's not that I'm jealous of these people: it's that it seems they have obtained the goals they've set for themselves while I seem to be in limbo...

I have always, for as far back as I can remember, wanted to be a writer. I am one. Then I wanted to be a published author. Guess what? I am one. But it looks like I didn't set the bar high enough, or I wasn't specific enough.  My ultimate goal, in my little heart of hearts, is to be a successful author, one that can make their living from their craft.

And herein lies the problem: I have 2 manuscripts that are almost finished, and they are the best I've written. But I am afraid that maybe they aren't New York Times best-seller list-worthy.  You can't attain your goal if you don't have faith in yourself. And as much faith as I have, I don't seem to focus enough of it my way. That's the problem.

So what am I going to do to get over this?  Am I just going to sit around and congratulate others as they move past me toward their happily ever afters?  Hell no! Not anymore. It's my turn to reach MY goal, to publish a book that not only people want to read, but that they will  encourage everyone they know to read it too.

At the end of the day, I know that success and happiness isn't measured in how much money you have. It's measured by how you feel about yourself at the end of the day.

With that being said: yes it would be awesome to be courted by the talk shows because I wrote the next "50 Shades".   But if I'm not true to me, then how would I enjoy that? I wouldn't.

So I continue to write what feels good and true to me.  Because if you write what you know, and what you live, and what you feel, and you're not afraid to lay yourself open to people:  then you'll find your true success and obtain your goal.  And I like the way that sounds!

'Nuff said? I think so.  I also think my new book, entitled "A Good Place To Start", will BE a good place for me to start my journey towards reaching "my turn".

Keep the faith. I know that I will!  And the new book will be available November 1st, so stay tuned!